


all my fears (are gone)

by wannaones



Category: Produce 101 (TV), Wanna One (Band)
Genre: Friends to Lovers, M/M, Puppy Love, Series Finale
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-22
Updated: 2017-06-22
Packaged: 2018-11-17 10:22:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,595
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11273523
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wannaones/pseuds/wannaones
Summary: For a moment, Daehwi forgets about the cameras focused on him. For a second, it’s suddenly only him and Jinyoung standing in front of each other.





	all my fears (are gone)

**Author's Note:**

> this is my first offering to this wonderful fandom/ficdom-- a deephwi/jinhwi fic inspired by the moment in pd101s2's finale where daehwi hugged jinyoung and _yefjhsjdgs_ the rest is history.

The commercial ends. They’re called on stage, all twenty boys with sweaty palms and uneven breaths. Somewhere in the midst of going up the platform, Daehwi finds comfort in the back of Jinyoung’s hand. They freeze for a moment when they touch, but Daehwi can see the small smile forming on Jinyoung’s face.

 

They part ways just as they stand on either side of the stage, and Daehwi tries to keep his mind calm even if the director’s countdown doesn’t help. _Three, two, one,_ and the lights go on. The national producers’ representative comes up to greet everyone and Daehwi scratches his thumbnail with his forefinger. He blocks out all of the sounds around him and realizes how his heart has been beating crazily ever since he stood on the stage with the other trainees. Daehwi looks up from the floor to the audience, and immediately sees a banner with his name on it. His heart calms a bit, but eventually finds its peacefulness when he looks at Jinyoung.

 

Suddenly, the fear of not seeing him anymore after the show creeps in, and Daehwi closes his eyes. His face was flashed on screen an hour before, apparently he’s one of the four boys vying for the 11th to 14th positions. He almost breaks down, if not for the strong hand holding his own backstage. 

 

_I believe in you. I think you can make it, Daehwi-yah._

 

BoA starts with the tenth trainee to be called up to the podium, and Daehwi crosses his fingers. He’s welcome to get any rank, as long as he gets in. That’s been his long time dream—to perform on stage and show what he’s really made of—and the past few months added something more to it.

 

He wants to sing with Jinyoung on stage, too.

 

“C9 entertainment trainee, Bae Jinyoung!”

 

The arena roars in happiness as Jinyoung’s name is called and Daehwi looks at him; their eyes lock just as the other boys run towards Jinyoung for a hug. Daehwi joins them and he feels more excited for Jinyoung. He knows Jinyoung badly wants to debut just like him, and to see him just a step closer to reaching his dream makes Daehwi happy as well.

 

“Congratulations, hyung!” He whispers when he gets the chance to get closer to Jinyoung and the older boy pats him on the back. Daehwi steps back to give Jinyoung space to move forward, but not before hearing his words.

 

_Come up with me as well. I’ll wait for you._

 

That’s how Lee Daehwi finds himself getting weaker as the numbers go lower, yet his name isn’t called yet. What if he didn’t make it? What if he wasn’t enough to enter the final 11?

 

Suddenly, the other stage with the 11 glorious and shining chairs seem so far away from him and he almost sobs if it weren’t for the cameras around him. He keeps a glum face as the numbers 7, 6, 5 are called. But he still happy for his brothers who are also slowly reaching for their dreams too. He’s especially happy when his labelmate, Woojin, gets in. Their CEO now has too treat all 4 of them, along with Youngmin and Donghyun, to a nice meal as soon as Produce 101 ends after all that they’ve been through.

 

He gives Woojin the biggest hug he can muster, feeling proud of him going from around 70 in the first week of voting, to being a part of the final 11 as the 6th ranked member. Daehwi waves a hand just as Woojin heads to the other side of the stage, and the fear creeps back in under his skin. He blows air in his mouth and keeps it in, like a puffing fish, to ease his nerves. Looking back and forth the fans holding his banners, it helps him calm down a bit, but he sneaks a glance to the chairs to look at Jinyoung.

 

Jinyoung’s already looking at him.

 

It’s already the 4th ranked trainee and his Jaehwan-hyung’s name isn’t called yet. He can hear some fans whining already, wondering if Jaehwan’s votes were enough to push him in the top 11. How could the group stand without him? All trainees acknowledge Jaehwan’s existence which is dire to the formation of the final group. Same with his Jonghyun-hyung, who Daehwi knows as a lot of fans too. He easily snagged the 1st place before from Jihoon, so it’s expected he’s going in. But there were only five slots left. One for Daniel, one for Jihoon, one for Jaehwan, and one for Jonghyun. Will he really not get in the final 11?

 

Then, Jaehwan’s name is called and everyone is screaming again. The remaining 13 boys are crowding around Jaehwan who looked like a lost sheep who didn’t hear his own name. They all cheer on for him as he goes up the stage, and Daehwi loses it.

 

He stops the tears trying to escape from his eyes, afraid that everyone will criticize him again for looking like he expected too much. But what can he do, he just a 17-year old who’s far away from his own mother, who lives without his father, and who came to Korea by himself to pursue his dreams. But as every number is called, he can slowly see his dreams flying farther and farther away from him, as if he isn’t really meant to get them in the first place.

 

 _The number three would belong to Kim Jonghyun-hyung,_ Daehwi says in his mind. His palms are beyond sweaty and he’s starting to feel dizzy from how fast his heart is beating. For the nth time that night, his and Jinyoung’s eyes meet. Words aren’t needed anymore. After months of living together, staying by each other’s side and comforting each other when they need it the most, they’ve learned to speak without any form of words needed. He can see the worry in Jinyoung’s eyes even if they’re hundreds of feet away from each other. Daehwi shakes his head, shooting Jinyoung a faint smile to let him know he will be okay.

 

(But deep inside, Daehwi is breaking. He can’t bear to not see Jinyoung often after Produce 101 ends. It will be his worst nightmare, not seeing the anchor who’s held onto him and kept him on the ground. Not when Jinyoung’s been so important to his life in the few months they’ve been together. He can’t handle it. He would not be able to handle it.)

 

He looks down to the floor, sighing in defeat, and then he hears it.

 

 _”Brand New Music’s,”_ and before he can hear the sentence completely, everyone’s arms are around him, squishing him in a big hug with all of the other boys around him. 

 

Everyone’s cheering for him, and he can see his fans crying for him. He can see Jihoon and Guanlin and Dongho and everyone else smiling at him, he can see the staff and even BoA’s big smiles directed towards him, and he sees Jinyoung, eyes sparkling in happiness after the announcement. He tears up a bit when their eyes lock, and Daniel teases him that he’s crying, but he insists he isn’t close to shedding tears and proceeds to walk towards the other stage where the chairs are. He looks back to the band of brothers he’s grown to love in the past few months and smiles at them before going up the stage and taking the mic from a staff.

 

With a mind in a haze and a mash of incoherent words of thanks and love to everyone who has supported him, he goes up the stairs with one thing in mind—Jinyoung.

 

They meet halfway and he stops right in front of him, and forgets about the world revolving around the two of them. What the two of them are, no one knows, even the two of them fail to acknowledge what they are, but one thing is for sure. Daehwi feels happy when he sees Jinyoung, and Jinyoung is happy when he’s with Daehwi. All the pain and hurt he’s felt in the past three months come rushing back and he remembers all the nights he’s cried in Jinyoung’s arms, not wanting other people to hear it other than him. Jinyoung knows all about his fears, about the hates he has received, about his problems which arised after joining the show. It has always been Jinyoung who mainly helped and supported him emotionally through his journey in the show and he’s the most thankful for him.

 

For a moment, Daehwi forgets about the cameras focused on him. For a second, it’s suddenly only him and Jinyoung standing in front of each other. He steps forward and grabs Jinyoung by the cheeks, and Jinyoung holds him by his middle, smiling at him and giggling because they both made it. Daehwi almost does something, if it weren’t for the sound director shouting at them to quickly go back to their place before the next trainee is announced. Daehwi snaps back to reality, and sees the camera in front of them, and hugs Jinyoung tightly instead, a tear finally escaping his eye. 

 

 _Hyung, I’m now here._ He says in his mind, happy to have walked to where Jinyoung is as well. Jinyoung hugs him closer and doesn’t let him go yet.

 

It's just the beginning of the flower road for the both of them.

 

Jinyoung smiles, as if he's heard his thoughts. “I’m glad you’re here with me. I’m really, really glad.”

**Author's Note:**

> this is still unknown territory to me, and writing them just based on what i saw for 11 episodes + behind-the-scenes videos + special cuts is really hard, but i just wanna spread the jinhwi/deephwi love ;__; (spreads sparkles to everyone)  
> kudos and comments are very much appreciated! check out my profile for the ships i'm going to write on if you're interested LOL


End file.
